"I got some for you too"
Believe it or not, we may not have seen Mel Gibson’s career prospects hit bottom yet, despite the release of a secretly recorded audio tape in which the perpetually apoplectic actor threatens to kill Russian girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva. (Details and the actual recording at RadarOnline.)
Already under investigation for domestic violence, Gibson now has a deserved reputation as an anti-Semitic, racist, sexist, drunken, violent asshole, with sparkly blue eyes. His problem, of course, is that his repellent behavior and incoherent rampages are documented by both Oksana’s tapes and police reports. Could this Hollywood meltdown possibly get any worse?
Of course it could! Here are five ways Mel Gibson’s reputation in Hollywood and throughout the world could plummet even more.
5. Confesses to killing Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, then setting up O.J.
4. Starts dating Dakota Fanning
3. Launches necrophilia website — Gibson’s Ghoulish Delights
2. During one-hour live special broadcast on ESPN, announces he’s signing with the Taliban
1. The Passion of the Christ, Part II
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One of the men below is Dennis Rader, the infamous BTK serial killer who murdered 10 people in Wichita, Kansas. The other guy is really fucked up.
One of Bonedaddy’s favorites regular features from The Dave Chappelle Show was “Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories.” Charlie is the older brother of comedian and actor Eddie Murphy. When Eddie’s career began skyrocketing in the ’80s, Charlie was there, working as part of Eddie’s entourage. In “True Hollywood Stories,” Charlie recounts his experiences playing basketball [...]
As I wrote in this post about the very beginning of my stand-up comedy career (such as it was), Dave Chappelle was a regular at the comedy club in Washington, D.C., where I made my debut. This was back in 1991, so Chappelle was only 17, based on the birthdate given for him on his [...]
Has there ever been an annual charade more insipid or cynical than Fox News shout-fest bully Bill O’Reilly’s grandstanding efforts to gin up a scary “War On Christmas”? Here’s O’Reilly’s latest pathetic effort to position himself as the Christian holiday’s noble and heroic defender:
I got laid off yesterday, nearly 11 years with the same online publisher ending with a two-minute phone call from the CEO. It was one of the best days of my life, not because of the adrenaline-fueled euphoria you initially feel when you lose a job you loath, but because it gave me an excuse [...]
I was in my usual coffee shop the other day when a guy with a very young boy began vacating an adjacent table. I had my laptop on and was going through my Twitter friends timeline, trying to tune out the surrounding commotion, when I heard a small voice to my right say, “Dad, is [...]
One day last year I listened to Rush Limbaugh for five minutes — my annual quota — ranting about government efforts to educate Americans on the benefits of switching to CFLs (compact fluorescent lamps) from regular light bulbs to save energy. Listening to him that day I realized what he does purely is an act. [...]
During the modern Dark Ages known as the Bush Era, I was highly disciplined about ignoring conservative nonsense in the media. It was, truthfully, a matter of preserving my sanity. I never watched television news or listened to right-wing talk radio, and I rarely visited online news and opinion sites such as The Drudge Report, [...]
As economic uncertainty and fear continue to grip our nation, my wife and I find ourselves searching for ways to insulate our family from catastrophe. We’ve considered the traditional strategies: mortgage unemployment insurance, second jobs, “turning out” our teenage daughter, etc. None of these, however, seem to offer a sufficient margin of security. Then the [...]
